On September 29, 1981, I committed a horrible crime against society. I committed a crime of murder that took the life of an innocent young (19) woman. She was the mother of a child, a daughter of a man and his wife, a sister of her siblings, and a friend to many. This crime also affected her family, my family, the community, the men and women of law enforcement and the justice system. For this I have constantly been remorseful and reminded of the pain and the suffering I have caused. During my time in prison I struggled for many years to turn my life around and take responsibility for what I had done. My sentence began in the Ohio State Penitentiary (Columbus) it was there that like any other, I was subjected to ridicule, bullying, being gazed upon by other men as property, and it was there that my punishment would be slow, severe, and where I realized that I may never get out again. Soon I was transferred to the Southern Ohio Correctional facility, known to all as "Lucasville" and "The end of the road". At the time Lucasville was Ohio's final destination for the worse of the worse. I am not going to say that I did not belong there, I DID! I was scared and felt that I could not be like the rest of those guys who had made their retirement package, which included a cell, lousy food, and loneliness, the worse anyone could ever feel. I was a young twenty (20) year old among those who had spent years on death row and several years without human interaction or human companionship. I had a rough way to go. It took five years for me to finally break down and admit that I could no longer live my life without forgiveness. I had hated myself so much that I allowed myself to be abused, mistreated, unhealthy, disrespected, and misused. I was so far into a deep remorse that I thought I was supposed to just beat myself beyond recognition. I opened a book given to me while I was in the county jail, not but a week in. It was the Upper Room. Inside t